Musings of a Confused Soul

Introduction to my Memories and Musings

As an Indian by birth and by culture, it is difficult at times to comprehend life in general when I started living in the US. That was a long time ago. Now I am part of this country as much as I am part of my motherland. Hence, I have so many complicated thoughts, which are leading to my interesting life here in the US. Even though I was born and brought up in India, I lived more years in the US and I am always trying to figure out where I actually belong. I have wonderful friends, in both countries.

My feelings are somewhat torn when it comes to identity. I feel like I live in both cultures on a daily basis yet not belonging to either one. I love discussions on philosophy and ancient history. I love Indian movies even with all the absurdity in them. There is always a heartwarming hidden message in almost every silly movie.

India always fascinated me. Every topic you touch is always in duality. There never was a straightforward answer to a straight forward question. Yet the answer jeers in one's face. All you have to do is to look into a person in India, may that be a child or an adult, you cannot help but find a silent spirituality, speaking volumes.

Just the same, the US still is challenging with changing times and people. I find it fascinating in a country where ‘all are equal‘ yet we are so different in many ways and most people get along very well. I had mixed feelings when I first came to the US. Naturally, leaving all the family and friends to live in a totally new country was not an easy adjustment to make in those days. It may be different now for young people who come to the US. For me, as days progressed I came to love it. I went through some funny and some not so funny days as I was adjusting to my life.

I made so many friends here who would offer their shoulders to lean on, if and when I had to go through hurdles in my personal life. I would do the same for my friends without a second thought. I cherish their friendship. Going through life can be such a beautiful experience, depending on who is in your life with you. There will always be ups and downs but with moral support from family and friends, we can overcome those hurdles. We only live once so hey…live a wonderful life.

If you ask me whether I would consider myself an Indian or American, I would say both.

America taught me how to live.
India raised me to adjust to life no matter which path it leads you to.

That reminds me of a song from one of Raj Kapoor's movies. I will post it under Beautiful Languages

After several of my friends and Family’s suggestions, I have decided to create this site. This provides me a way to express my thoughts, and control those in an organized fashion, instead of letting those wander all over my brain by accomplishing zilch.

I hope this writing will give me an outlet to my confused musings and clarify my purpose in life. Hope you enjoy reading my posts and feel free to post comments under the guest book.


09.06.2021 10:58

shyamala Rao

Debbie Reynolds, excellent actress.

10.09.2021 21:40


Hey Shyamala, Yes. She was. I liked all her movies.

04.03.2020 06:51


Hi dear Aruna, This is Negar, I read your notes, I enjoyed, I have a same feel like your feel.
I’ll try to read your another sentence.😊❤️🙏🌸

06.03.2020 06:36


Thank you Negar. I am so glad you enjoyed it. Yes, although we all came to US from different places I can imagine how similar it can be for us. I look forward to reading your comments on other posts.

20.01.2020 06:04

Malvinder Kaur

I agree with you in regards to the confusion one has as far as belonging is concerned.

20.01.2020 20:52


At one point, I was not really sure which way to step in. But now I am fine the way it is. I don't mind keeping both feet on different continents!

20.01.2020 20:51


Hey Jugnu, yes, I do feel like one foot is on one continent and the other one on another.

10.11.2019 21:44

Dayna Lewis

I love you!!!!

11.11.2019 00:30


I love you too Dayna!!! 😘🤗😇

20.10.2019 01:11


I feel the same way in the sense that I had to leave all my family and friends when I came here. Kind of like I was listening to myself as I was reading it.

11.11.2019 18:28


Hi Rosanna, I totally agree. A lot of my other friends expressed similar thoughts.

04.11.2019 18:36


Hi Rosanna,
I totally agree. A lot of my other friends expressed similar thoughts.

06.08.2019 11:16

Diana Williams

Hi there ,What would a huge increase in relevant traffic mean for your business? If I could greatly increase the number of customers who are interested in your products and services, wouldn't you be interested .

Have a good day !

06.08.2019 17:48


Thank you Diana, but I am not in "Business". This is something I do because I enjoy writing. Thank you again.

20.07.2019 00:40


Beautifully written. Makes me think about my heritage.

20.07.2019 21:30


Thank you MaryRose.